dating advice ... save energy for real challenges of a healthy relationship

I agree with this.  


https://youtu.be/bcNr9SXdsMQ?si=R0TXzkbzRA_O5319

This video challenges the common notion of love as overcoming obstacles and highlights the mistake many people make in dating: pursuing those who are emotionally unavailable or unenthusiastic (0:44-1:07).

The key takeaway is that we should only pursue relationships with individuals who demonstrate genuine enthusiasm and commitment from the outset (0:08-0:16, 3:45-3:54). The video emphasizes the importance of recognizing and focusing on those who are "keen, open, and ready" (0:26-0:29), and to quickly dismiss those who are evasive, defensive, or unreliable (4:37-4:40, 4:55-4:57). Ultimately, it advocates for a more mature approach to dating that saves us from needless heartache and allows us to focus on the actual challenges of a relationship with a willing partner (5:17-5:22).
........

I know that I don't do a consistent job of demonstrating enthusiasm from the start of meeting and acquaintance.... Not responding to text messages right away, and perhaps inconsistent attitudes? I think I need to monitor how may come across in these respects and also heed this advice in order to make time and energy for finding my future partner. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

bird 2 cleaning spilled chick formula

Cleaning dried or sticky baby parrot formula off a 4-week-old cockatiel requires gentleness, warmth, and safety to avoid chilling, stressing, or damaging the chick's developing feathers and skin. Here’s the vet-recommended method, based on Clinical Avian Medicine (Harrison & Lightfoot, 2006) and Essentials of Avian Medicine and Surgery (Coles, 2007): --- Safe Cleaning Method for Formula Spills Materials Needed Warm, filtered water (38–40°C / 100–104°F) Soft cotton pad or gauze Diluted saline solution (optional, 1 tsp salt per cup of boiled cooled water) Towel to support the chick and prevent slipping Dry towel or low-heat hairdryer for drying afterward Steps 1. Warm the area first: Moisten a cotton pad or soft cloth with warm water. Gently press it against the crusted formula for 30–60 seconds to soften it—do not rub yet. 2. Gently wipe: Once softened, use another moist pad or gauze to gently wipe the area in the direction of feather growth. 3. Repeat if needed: If the formula ...
Read more

Being single on purpose. By John Kim

Concepts: Wanting something too badly without knowing for sure is scary to the other person.  Single on Purpose: Redefine Everything. Find Yourself First. by John Kim. --- Introduction John Kim introduces his philosophy of living “single on purpose.” He discusses the importance of discovering your authentic self, building a fulfilling life independently, and breaking free from the societal pressure to always be in a relationship. The goal is to become whole on your own before seeking love. --- Chapter 1: Why You Should Be Single on Purpose This chapter emphasizes why being single can be a powerful period for self-growth. Kim challenges the societal norms around relationships and encourages readers to reframe singlehood as an opportunity for self-discovery and personal development. --- Chapter 2: What Does Being Single on Purpose Look Like? Kim explores what it means to be single intentionally rather than passively. He highlights the importance of embracing solitude, fostering new i...
Read more

Shyness

 How to defeat shyness:  First, Why is it important to overcome my shyness?   I need to face the reality that unless I overcome shyness, I will die alone.  I will need to realize the greater fear of dying alone is greater.  .....CBT hasn't helped.  ... I will have a first session with a dating coach this Friday.  She mentioned using exposure strategies as a way to work through my fears and shyness.  ... I have read a lot of books and workbooks but I think this didn't help because I failed to properly implement them.  Insight from doing DBT workbook:  the more I avoid, the more likely I will avoid next time. 
Read more